Do You Have a Gal Gang?
And by "gal gang" I mean do you have a caring, nurturing, supportive and uplifting network of women surrounding you? Or at least one? More and more and more I’m finding that a lot of women don’t have any of this and it’s totally unnerving to me. I was never the kid that had a large group of girlfriends, but I ALWAYS had at least one, usually two, super duper close pals that totally got me, were there when I needed them and I could trust. Man-oh-man did that get me through some rough times.
That all changed in my mid 20’s all the way through my mid to late 30’s. WOW was that a lonely time for me. I met John when I was 28. We married when I was 30 and had Ella by the time I was 32. John beautifully filled the gap that my lack of pals created (and to this day he really is my very best friend) but you cannot expect one person to fill all the needs of another person, especially if that person is the opposite gender AND your spouse. So, although I had him and Ella to keep me much-loved during those years, I really missed having other women to rely on for advice, opinions and support.
It really wasn’t until the last 6 years of my life that I was blessed enough to be surrounded by some really amazing, brilliant and beautiful women. You know how you don’t even realize what you missed out on till you have that one thing, then you’re like, “Damn! I wish I had this all along!” That was me. Though I do believe in divine timing for sure. Each of the women in my life that are my angels (and you know who you are) all came to me one-by-one and each in their own unique way. Their sharp wit, smart mouths, senses of humor, intuition, wisdom and strong sense of female connection and support has been both gift and lesson to me and I am so much a better person and a better woman because of each and every one of them.
My goal now is to be the best gal pal I can be to them, and to other women that need a partner in crime. To be honest, it took me all this time to actually learn how to be a good friend right back. Truly, it took me all this time to learn balance, give and take and to understand who deserves my time and who does not.
You know what I’m talking about. Which friends do you walk away from and feel refreshed, lifted up and like a powerhouse? Which friends do you walk away from second-guessing yourself, feeling a bit self-conscious and like you need to up your game? U-huh…stew on that for a minute.
If you are a gal that needs a pal or two, remember, you have to put some effort into it. First off, you have to put yourself out there and be bold. Ask the mom that’s there every day at drop off to go to coffee. Catch the woman that you talk to at every yoga class and go get a glass of wine. Be present, be available and be fearless.
If you are the gal that has a pal or two, remember to include those that don’t. When you see a woman that looks like they could use a friend, be a friend. It doesn’t have to be a lifelong commitment, but even one cup of coffee can do another woman a world of good.
Let’s take care of each other, ladies. This is our time, this is our family, this is our tribe.
Happy Friending!
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